Um, what IS that??

I am a pretty determined person. I'm by no means an expert on all topics, but I can at least be competent at a task if I put my mind to it. This is a skill I've worked very hard on throughout my life and thus it can be exceptionally frustrating when it just doesn't click for a certain topic.

For example, I am quite possibly the world's WORST cook. But this hasn't really bubbled to extreme frustration because I must admit that I have never really, TRULY put my mind to this one. I don't really enjoy cooking...I know many find it relaxing, but I am not one of them. For me, it is really quite simple. When I am hungry, I like to eat. As in, NOW. I don't like to chop, mix, boil, broil, bake, grill, toss, slice, grate, you get the picture. I'm not the most patient of people (would you have EVER known that if I hadn't told you?) and when food is involved, my patience level goes much lower. I'm thinking a lot about cooking lately though and I might just give it another chance...maybe. But that is for a later post.

For today, back to the subject at hand. Namely, taks that for whatever reason, allude me.

By far, the most frustrating to date is a simple little thing we all know as potty training. I know, I know - many of you have actual human children and I'm sure can put my frustration in this area to shame, but this is about me (isn't it always? j/k!) and I came to this party to VENT.

Cooper is stubborn. I mean REALLY stubborn. But also terribly cute which is a dangerous combination. Picture it: he shreds an entire roll of paper towels and then shreds the roll itself. Our upstairs looks like the aftermath of a hurricane...but when I go to scold him for this very naughty offense, he crouches down, wiggles his tail furiously, looks at me with those eyes that turn everything to mush, and does his little growl/bark ewok combination which translates to "yay, isn't this so much fun?? let's play NOW!" My "NO, BAD BOY" isn't nearly as effective when delivered through laughter and followed immediately by a play session. But that is paper. I can pick it up, vacuum and everything is good as new.

His other naughty offense is not so easily corrected. This is no secret to anyone who knows us, but he is horrible with the potty thing. He happily makes his toilet wherever he pleases. Coffe table leg? Absolutely! Dining room rug? You bet. On top of the couch? Why not, doesn't everyone go there??

You know the only more annoying way to be awakened from a lovely sleep than a shrill, shrieking alarm clock? You'd hear this from your hubby: "ugh, is that crap or vomit??" OR you would just stick your foot or leg right in a pile of something terribly pleasant. That's right folks, Cooper hurled all over our bed this morning. Now, we're not angry at him when he's sick (that's different than the poo), but still...c'mon!! What's wrong with the floor? Or over the side? Or anywhere other than the beautiful Restoration Hardware comforter that you've already christened with pee several times before? I mean, how much is that thing gonna take before we just can't salvage it anymore??

I have read books, researched online, talked to animal behaviorists and trainers and groomers and experts...we've tried it all. Nothing doing. It's Cooper's world, we just live here.

He better be glad he's cute.